Thursday, December 1, 2011

Ending or Beginning?

The page is turned, a story has concluded.
You sit wondering, stunned and even amazed at the ending.
Unsure how to respond you tell yourself that you must simply continue on as if "it"
had never happened.
You know that you must let go for healing to begin it's work and so you can
live and feel again.  However what you know, is not what you want to do.
So instead of opening up, you stuff all those feelings of hurt and confusion into the deepest, darkest corner you can find.  Then you turn around with your most convincing smile pasted on your face.
You go on.  You're fine, or so you say.  You keep on telling that to everyone who cares to ask "I'm fine" and lie even more by pasting that false display of joy on your face.
After a while you've even convinced yourself that you're "okay" and that you've gotten over "it."
But then that "something" happens.  The words of a song, a memory replayed, etc.
It all comes back and hits you right where you thought it no longer hurt.
And you come just a little bit closer to breaking.
But you're stronger than this you tell yourself and try all the harder to forget.
So you put up another wall.
As you sink deeper into yourself, furthering yourself from those who care, from God, from love.

A page has turned.  A story has ended.
Has it? Or is it only the beginning?

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